PLOT TWIST OF THE FARMING CENTURY! 
Commissioner Bill Braswell (a blueberry farmer) doesn’t oppose TNVR because of “birds or manatees” — nope. He’s secretly THRILLED that 1,785 cats escaped Polk County Animal Control over the last 4+ years and multiplied into 11,001+ community cats…
THE TRUTH: Braswell RELIES on Sheriff Grady’s 11,001 berry-saving whisker brigade as his FREE blueberry farm workforce — multiplying soon into a paw-powered mega-squad of 35,000+ feline heroes!
Braswell’s Secret Thoughts:
“Tariffs may eat my profits, but Sheriff Grady’s deputized whisker brigade will save my berries from those crop-destroying rats!“
And to all of you emotional animal advocates? My June 3rd message still stands: You have the right to SHUT UP! We are not gonna help you, you can talk all day, and that won’t change the facts.” Translation: “Go elsewhere! You can’t spay/neuter my 4-legged unpaid agricultural workforce!” 
IN RESPONSE TO C. BRASWELL: WE Polk-CAT-vocates believe Sheriff Grady’s 11,001+ graduated kitty relatives and their grand-babies deserve TNVR:
T = Trap = Humanely chauffeured in Sheriff Grady’s new Corvette convoy N = Neuter = Healthcare benefits vouchers + Paid sick leave V = Vaccinate = with $0 copay, no deductible R = Return = guaranteed job placement back on Braswell’s blueberry fields
And yes, even the American Bar Association (Resolution 102B) backs us up: (because those 400,000 lawyers men they know their stuff ): Exempt caregivers from “owner” definitions – otherwise, Braswell OWNS Sheriff Grady’s cats! Exempt caregivers from feeding bans — or else Bill gets banned and 
bye-bye, Blueberry Bill’s bankrupt empire!
After 25 years, Blueberry Bill Braswell realized he didn’t need to hire pest control – he just needed to benefit from Sheriff Grady’s 20-year cat workforce development program! 
P.S.:” It’s not about the birds, I hate those suckers that eat my berries.”
#PolkCounty #BraswellBlueberries #EscapedCatsWorkForFree #TNVRIsHealthcare #ShutUpAndPayUp
Satire by Vicky Quintanilla
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